It started with a kiss… I never thought it would come to this…

Oh my God! This can’t be happening!

Horrific reports are coming in of yet another shocking incident in the strife-ridden province of Aceh. Despite the peace deal reached between the Achenese rebels and the Indonesian government, it seems that this region will never be free of the barbaric practices of the Indonesian #####.

It may be difficult to believe, but in an act of despicable waywardness, an Indonesian soldier actually had the effrontery to kiss his Acehnese girlfriend in public!!! And unlike in the past, when only minor misdemeanors like summary executions and torture were committed, this time the relevant authorities have felt it only right to apologize for such a blatant violation of human rights.

According to the local press in Indonesia:

The incident occurred when about 2,500 troops were about to board a ship at Lhokseumawe to leave Aceh under the terms of a government peace pact with separatist rebels.

A soldier from the country's main island of Java was kissed on the lips by his Acehnese girlfriend minutes before he was about to board.

(how can that be possible in a country like Indonesia? Good God, even in violence-ridden Iraq, such incidents are unheard of)

North Aceh military spokesman Erie Sutiko said Major General Supiadin Adisaputra apologised to Acehnese immediately after the incident.

"It was a spontaneous act committed by two lovers. The ship was about to leave the port. The soldier has been scolded by the commander," Mr Sutiko said.

Earlier yesterday scores of students from the Indonesian Muslim Student Union picketed the governor's office in Banda Aceh, demanding the soldier be flogged for what they termed an adulterous act.

(flogged?!!! Are they kidding? Surely such barbarity warrants the death penalty!)

The students held aloft pictures of the couple's kiss.

(I scanned the pic from the Jakarta Post. You can see it below, but be warned it’s not for the squeamish!)

But thank God all is not lost. The Indonesian government appears to have given its utmost attention to such a serious issue and put minor problems like poverty alleviation, healthcare and job creation on the backburner:

Members of parliament in the world's most populous Muslim country have proposed an anti-pornography bill that includes a ban on kissing on the mouth in public.

Heavy kissing could carry a maximum penalty of five years in jail or a $29,000 fine. Anyone caught flashing would face similar penalties.

Right on!! In a country where a typical worker makes only around one million rupiah (US$100) per month, it would take an offender somewhere in the region of 24 years to pay off the fine.

Good. I’m glad I got that off my chest. Must dash though: I’m off to ########


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