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Full compulsory military conscription in Indonesia MUST be implemented immediately before it is too late!

According to plans drawn up by the Indonesian defence minister, Indonesia will recruit 100 million personnel for Indonesia’s “Defending the State” program within the next 10 years.

Through such a program “the spirits of patriotism and love of the Fatherland would be planted in every citizen.”

All men and women aged between 18 and 70 would be obliged to sign up with special battalions of old-aged pensioners.

These “Dad’s Army” battalions would only be supplied with brooms rather than guns.



“At that age their eyesight is so poor they are more likely to shoot each other rather than the enemy. There’s no need to take any unnecessary risks.”

“Despite Indonesia’s huge armed forces (numbering around half a million), the threat of foreign invasion has never been higher”.

“Indonesia is literally surrounded on all sides. To the south we have Australia and there is no telling what they might do after a few bintangs. Just look at how they have devasted Bali."

"Closer by are those canny Singaporeans and given they only have a small island it’s only natural they are jealous of our vast lands. And as for the Malaysians, well they are just a despicable bunch of boisterous hooligans who claim our culture and eat our cuisine (they especially like nasi padang).

Among our women’s battalions, we will have one especially for celebrities, models and actresses. I’m sure they will give the sexy North Koreans a run for their money.



And to boost the spirits of our cadres, all will be given nasi bungkus twice a day (although you will have to pay a joining-up fee, uniform fee and membership card fee …)





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