BMTH live in Jakarta 2024

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This time around Ravel gets it right and BMTH (Bring Me The Horizon) are headlining the Nexfest festival in Jakarta which also features Babymetal. In this format there is no seating - which makes for a much more intimate experience - although you do have to arrive really early if you want to pick a spot right up close to the stage.  We arrived about six hours before BMTH were scheduled to start their performance and bought plenty of drinks to stay hydrated in the tropical afternoon heat (mind you, some of those were Iceland vodka mix!) This was a gig I had long been looking forward to - especially after the debacle last year. Not everyone likes BMTH of course. For deathcore fans the band sold out. For metal heads the band is not purist enough. And for the wider mainstream audience, the band is too heavy. You can't please everyone of course but there are few bands in the rock world which can match the sheer emotional velocity of BMTH. To bring metal and even aspects of metalcore t

Julia Perez: Indonesia's best DJ!

Julia Perez DJ
Julia Perez would make a great DJ.

And here’s a very funny joke for you:

DJ: "Hey! This is Ed on Jakarta-FM. Have you ever heard of 'Mate Match'?"

Contestant: (laughing) "Yes, I have."

DJ: "Great! Then you know we're giving away a trip to Bali if you win.
What is your name? First only please."

Contestant: "Budi."

DJ: "Budi, are you married or what?"

Budi: (laughing nervously) "Yes, I am married."

DJ: "Thank you. Now, what is your wife's name? First only please."

Budi: "Ayu."

DJ: "Is Ayu at work, Budi?"

Budi: "She is gonna kill me."

DJ: "Stay with me here, Budi! Is she at work?"

Budi: (laughing) "Yes, she's at work."

DJ: "Okay, first question - when was the last time you had sex?"

Budi: "About 8 o'clock this morning."

DJ: "Atta boy, Budi."

Budi: (laughing sheepishly) "Well..."

DJ: "Question #2 - How long did it last?"

Budi: "About 10 minutes."

DJ: "Wow! You really want that trip, huh? No one would ever have said that if a trip wasn't at stake."

Budi: "Yeah, that trip sure would be nice."

DJ: "Okay. Final question. Where did you have sex at 8 o'clock this morning?

Budi: (laughing hard) "I, ummm, I, well..."

DJ: "This sounds good, Budi. Where was it at?"

Budi: "Not that it was all that great, but her mum is staying with us for a couple of weeks..."

DJ: "Uh huh..."

Budi: "...and the Mother-In-Law was in the shower at the time."

DJ: "Atta boy, Budi."

Budi: "On the kitchen table."

DJ: "Not that great?? That is more adventure than the previous hundred times I've done it. Okay folks, I will put Budi on hold, get this wife's work number and call her up. You listen to this."

[3 minutes of commercials follow. ]

DJ: "Okay audience; let's call Ayu, shall we?" (touch tones.....ringing....)

Clerk: "Kinkos."

DJ: "Hey, is Ayu around there somewhere?"

Clerk: "This is she."

DJ: "Ayu, this is Ed with JAKARTA-FM. We are live on the air right now and I've been talking with Budi for a couple of hours now."

Ayu: (laughing) "A couple of hours?"

DJ: "Well, a while now. He is on the line with us. Budi knows not to give any answers away or you'll lose. Sooooooo... do you know the rules of 'Mate Match'?"

Ayu: "No."

DJ: "Good!"

Budi: (laughing)

Ayu: (laughing) "Budi, what the hell are you up to?"

Budi: (laughing) "Just answer his questions honestly, okay? Be completely honest."

DJ: "Yeah yeah yeah. Sure. Now, I will ask you 3 questions, Ayu. If your answers match Budi's answers, then the both of you will be off to Bali for 5 days on us.

Ayu: (laughing) "Yes."

DJ: "Alright. When did you last have sex, Ayu?"

Ayu: "Oh God,....uh, this morning before Budi went to work."

DJ: "What time?"

Ayu: "Around 8 this morning."

DJ: "Very good. Next question. How long did it last?"

Ayu: "12, 15 minutes maybe."

DJ: "Hmmmm. That's close enough. I am sure she is trying to protect his manhood. We've got one last question, Ayu. You are one question away from a trip to Bali. Are you ready?"

Ayu: (laughing) "Yes."

DJ: "Where did you have it?"

Ayu: "OH MY GOD, BUDI!! You didn't tell them that did you?"

Budi: "Just tell him, honey."

DJ: "What is bothering you so much, Ayu?"

Ayu: "Well..."

DJ: Come on Ayu..... where did you have it?

Ayu: "Up the ar$e....."

After a long pause, the DJ said, "Folks, we need to take a station break"

And the drivers of Jakarta almost crashed their cars laughing!

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